Gluttony

At certain points on this trip comfort food is all I have wanted to eat. Points like yesterday, when an over night bus ride, and 5 hours of bad sleep, pushed me to my complete whits end. Here in Vietnam, cravings are magnified by the fact that comfort food is hard to come by. So at the end of that bus ride, when I found a lone bag of goldfish crackers in some off-beat market, Brittany and I sat on the sidewalk and ate the whole bag in one sitting. Often I fill my bus rides with thoughts of Caesar salads, BBQ Ribs, baked beans, and cornbread. Sometimes all I can think about are bacon burgers with grilled onions, and a thick slice of pepper jack; other times, on a better nights sleep and when I'm feeling a bit less vulnerable, I can't be bothered to consider eating anything but local cuisine... It’s just that street vendors do not cater to the timid eater.

At present, Britt is bed ridden. Taken down, we think, by some street side meal that got the better of her. She is three days deep in the same food-born-hell-ride that has already hit me three times this trip. Still, we return to the same street side plastic chairs for more than half our meals. It's not that we are gluttons for pain; it's simply that when the food is "good", words can't be found to express how "good" it really is. The Curries and soups of South East Asia are better, than we could have hoped, but we also have been happily surprised by quality jumps in some every day staples. Then there are the regional specialties. (The Pha, the spring rolls, Mae Heo, etc)

The food has made the trip. Corn just tastes better here. (Sorry Iowa. It is what it is. Asia's got you beat.) Bananas are almost unrecognizable they are so much better, and similar statements can be made about most of the produce here. The Coffee... Ahhhh. My love for Seattle is betrayed by my Vietnamese coffee preference. There's nothing I can say. The French left behind there namesake press, and the Vietnamese have put it to use. And Bah minh takes it a step further dethroning Paseo's Cuban roast to become my all time favorite sandwich. Cuban Roasts are amazing; they just don't cost $0.50. Vietnamese Pastries, Thai BBQ, street side lobster, the list of "epic eats on the cheap" is endless... You just need to be daring.

So you see, it's not that we are gluttons for pain, it's simply that we are gluttons in general. It's no more admirable, but it should be a bit more understandable. When a $0.75 black-forest chocolate-tart is the only accessible comfort food, gluttony comes easily.


Food is what brought us to Hoi An. Located in central Vietnam, Hoi An is one of the oldest cities/towns in the country. It is a quaint French colonial town, a UNESCO world heritage site, and a foody’s dream. In the day the tailors and cobblers can be a bit overwhelming, but at night the town glimmers in a different light. The streets were empty and the restaurants were full. The “hard sells” were gone and so were my cravings for cheeseburgers. For 4 food filled days Vietnamese cuisine and French style cafes captivated my every thought. Well that and suits but you had to see that coming…

After 3 days of scouring the town to no avail, Britt and I walked into the stand alone best tailor we had yet seen. It was 7 o’clock at night and no more than 12 hours before our scheduled departure, but I had to make it work. Britt was on board as usual, so after I jumped through some hoops to have our travel arrangements changed. We then jumped back on our bike and rode to the tailor’s, and at 9 o’clock at night I shed my gun totting squirrel shirt to be draped in wool/cashmere pin stripes.

They tried to sell me on an almost pure silk/cashmere blend, but when I felt the material and pictured the coat it would become, all I could picture was a fat, middle aged man, eyeing himself in the mirror and asking “doesn’t this ego make my ass look smaller.” (If the visual evades you picture Rodeny Dangerfeild, without the comic releif.) Anyways, I exnayed that and requested something timeless. I asked them to make me look like Don Corleone; and the tailor made it so. Isn't that how a suit is supposed to make you feel? Maybe it has my ego a bit over-inflated, but if I can find one who will have me, an employer will cut that down to size, and if pin stripe armor helps me hold onto some shred of confidence when that happens, then what more could be asked of fancy fabric and simple stitching? Now all I need is a shower, a shave, and a hair cut and I will be half way presentable again.